Thursday, May 05, 2011

Still Unemployed, Still Depressed

I've been looking for work for the past 4 months, plus a little time before Christmas. Job searching by far is the most depressing thing and can bring anyone down, not just those already inclined towards depression. I guess the hard part for me is that despite all the resumes I'm sending out I haven't heard back from a single place. I have yet to land any kind of an interview. The second part is that about a month ago I decided to stop looking for work anywhere in Canada and focus just on the area around where Quiet Confidence lives. This has presented some problems since it's an area heavily focused on Math related careers and Computer stuff - both of which I'm wildly unqualified for.

I haven't worked a corporate job in 5 years, just academia (TAing and the like), and I think it's hurting my chances. There's no easy answer to finding a job, let alone finding a job as a History major. The best I can do is get up every morning and surf the job boards and toss out resumes to anything that looks like I'm sort of qualified for. I've noticed though in the last month or so that I'm finding it very hard to motivate myself to apply for things. I honestly thought I would have found something by now, even a contract position somewhere for a couple of months. There just isn't a high demand for qualitative research based jobs - if I could rock statistics than I would easily be employed by now I'm sure.

Overall I'm just dissatisfied and my med's aren't working as well as they should be. I'm also growing more despondent about the current state of my personal life. I never thought I'd be one of those girls who gets all upset about not getting engaged/married, but there it is. After 3 years with a person who ticks all my boxes and is the best thing that has happened to me relationship-wise I don't understand what is holding him back. We talk about marriage and future plans all the time, but as far as I know he hasn't made any step closer to asking me to marry him. Just about everyone in my family is asking when we're getting married already - and some are down right aggressive about it. It's to the point where I'm avoiding going home so I don't have to hear it anymore. I don't think he realizes how upset the whole thing makes me since I try not to bug him about it or even talk about it anymore. I don't want to pressure him since everyone else seem's to be doing that.

2 comments:

Jaclyn said...

I'm so sorry! I hope you find a nice job soon, and wish you all the best.

Anonymous said...

Men! You can't live with them, and you can't kill 'em.
Best of luck on the job front. I bet when you least expect it, you'll find what you seek (I sound like a damn fortune cookie). I have actually found that to be true, though. Just keep getting the resumes out and the phone calls made. :-) XO